VENT Vol. 1

I just paid my first parking violation ticket in my now seven years at this university. I have never parked where I wasn't supposed to.

Two weeks ago my wife was suffering with immense back pain after aggravating a disc injury she's had since she was in college. The problem is very debilitating, and it is very painful for her to do anything other than be still. Because she started a new job a little more than a month ago, she can't really miss more than the day and a half she already had. One thing that is difficult for her when she suffers this pain is driving. Ashlee's car is standard, and the herky-jerky motion required to drive this kind of engine especially hurts her. She asked me to drive her car last Monday so she could drive my automatic to work. I agreed and found a faculty/staff park with it when I returned to work.

I returned to the car after work and found two tickets pressed between the windshield and the wiper blade. One was a $15 citation for "parking in a staff or reserved slot." The other was a $30 charge for having a "sticker not visible/improperly registered." At this point I was not angry; how was anyone to know my predicament?

Printed on the ticket is a Web address where I could go and pay or appeal my fine. I assumed
that — given the circumstances and the fact that my faculty-stickered car was not currently taking up a spot — the fines would be dismissed with a wave and a smile if not with a reminder that the car should be registered. I made my case, told how I was a faculty member parking in a faculty spot and I even related my wife's back troubles. This morning I received judgment:

The $15 citation:
"After a careful review of your citation appeal, the Traffic Appeals Committee has decided to accept your appeal. All charges for this traffic citation will be removed from your record. Put a note in the window so the officer will know. The sticker allows the car to park in faculty staff parking not your title." (But the title deems me worthy of stickering in the first place. Which came first, the sticker or the hire?)

The $30 citation:
"After a careful review of your citation appeal, the Traffic Appeals Committee has decided to reduce the amount of your citation fine. Please remit payment for the citation within 10 days to avoid late fees. You may pay for the citation online at ... or you may pay in the Business Office. (sic) Stidkers are free and take just minutes to obtain online. Register the car and put a sticker in the windshield."

My fine was reduced to $15. Maybe I'll take a few extra pens and notebooks home from the office to balance the books.